Guilt in the era of Positive Psychology

Photo by Timothy Paule II from Pexels

For the past decade or so, the concept of self-improvement has gained impressive steam and paved the way to the rise of an industry that is estimated to generate profits of ten billion dollars a year.

The hype might have started somewhere around 2011, when the United Nations adopted a resolution that made research on happiness part of its official agenda, setting the ground for the pursuit of knowledge and content production on the topic. Three years later, in 2014, the World Economic Forum Annual Meeting (also known as the Davos Conference) dedicated 25 sessions to questions on mental and physical wellness, a number significantly higher than those held in 2008*.

Experts started to emerge from the most unsuspecting places and to offer a myriad of solutions for the eternal quest for a happy life, some of them carefully branded with foreign names for higher selling potential.

Having this immense body of knowledge easily accessible and at disposal, the idea that happiness was within personal control spread fast. Positive mottos such as “good vibes only”, “just be happy” and “think happy thoughts” were sprayed all over instagram accounts, offices and coffee shops alike, contributing to the generalized self-confidence in one’s ability to exert influence over emotional states.

“We individualists are great at crediting ourselves for our victories, but we are just as good at blaming ourselves for failure. And today, exacerbated by the rise of social media, more and more of us are feeling like failures.” — Will Storr, New Philosopher

The sense of control surely is empowering, but it also carries a certain weight of responsibility. I am capable of generating conditions for my own wellbeing, therefore I am responsible for feeling well. And if I don’t, it’s on me, isn’t it? If happiness is my choice, and I’m not feeling happy, who else is there to blame but myself?

At this point I must say that, being a trained Psychologist, I firmly believe in individuals’ capacity for improvement. But the point that this self-optimization euphoria has neglected to mention is that, as the founder of Positive Psychology Martin Seligman has explained, about 50% of our ability to experience positive emotion is actually not under our control. So blaming ourselves for feeling sad is unfair, not to mention borderline delusive and narcissistic.

It is often said that depression is ‘anger turned inwards’. In many ways, happiness science is ‘critique turned inwards’. — William Davies

Maybe I’m just speaking for myself here, but I think we’ve come to a point where happiness became just another performance arena, one in which you should always aim for higher achievements. Ironically, this seems to have created space for another industry to emerge, one in which, curiously enough, there is also comfort to be found in foreign words. Today there is no shortage of articles and books on how to be less perfect, rest, do nothing and try to find balance in the never ending pursuit of excellence (by the way, here’s a great reflection on how this drive has corrupted our ability to have fun with hobbies).

And you know what? This is my hobby: writing as a way to organize my thoughts and process the complexity of the world around me. Some people knit, others paint; I like to research, combine sources, and write about the patterns I see. So I thought I would do this thing I really love, just for the sake of it. And maybe, for once, not feel guilty if the output is not absolutely deep, thorough, or bulletproof. Hope you’ll forgive me. I sure as hell will try to forgive myself.

. . .

*This is according to The Happiness Industry: How the Government and Big Business Sold Us Well-Being, by William Davies

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